Thank God It’s Friday (1978)
Total Goldblum Rating: 8/10
Italian (?!) nightclub owner Jeff Goldblum will seduce your wife in this late ’70s disco fest that also features the late Donna Summer and a Latino Jason Schwartzman who dances on cars and calls himself “Leatherman.”
Goldblum presence: 6/10
It’s an ensemble comedy, so he’s not the focus of the film; that said, the ripple of seduction he leaves in his wake (jewelry store clerks! club employees! some accountant’s wife!) makes quite the impression.
Goldblum hotness: 9/10
At just 25 years old, Goldblum is at his lankiest here, and the hair has not yet verged into terrible ’80s territory. He loses one point for being a sleaze, but none for being creepy: He’s not a creeper, because it’s clear that all of the women he entertains know exactly what they’re getting into (his pants, not his heart) and are, in fact, lining up for the opportunity.
His lack of width creates the impression of extra height; he towers over everyone, including costumed gorilla elevator operators. His successful seduction efforts take the form of crazy eyes, sexy flippance, and remarkably rapid monologuing, although his hands stay stationary (the disco suit weighs them down). However, while his disco includes a game room and a stairwell in which various characters are easily trapped, he somehow neglected to install a piano.